Friday, June 24, 2011

Get on the Mic.

Good morning or something! Rather than just admitting to the fact that I have been mostly lazy and uninspired for the past few weeks, I will list all of the things that got in my way recently and prevented me from writing new material.  Some are reasons, some are excuses, and some are just thoughts that passed through my head.  I will not list laziness, because that would be too honest.  I seem to have problems writing routines when my actual daily routine gets upset.  It's DEFINITELY not because I haven't had the time.  So here they are, in no particular order, my list of excuses.

- Packing.
- Moving.
- Doing taxes.
- Clipping toe nails.
- What's my wife watching?  Jersey Shore?  I should probably study it.
- Eating.
- Watching zombie movies.
- Writing on a Wednesday seems wrong.
- I'll write tomorrow.
- But I currently need to poop!
- The sun is still up.
- The sun just went down.
- Umm...


Wait a minute... I just realized that this shtick is pretty much lifted from David Cross's "I Drink For a Reason".  But that's ok.  The main reason for writing this was to get my head back into it, and to assure anyone out there in TV Land that I have not died, stopped making observations, or worse, decided that I had nothing left to say.  I promise not to take any long breaks ever again ever, even though I can't promise that, since, at anytime I could wind up dead, stop making observations or decide that I have nothing left to say.  Anyways, I've made that promise before (see: Unclogue), so I guess I'm all about empty promises.  But this will be a NEW new chapter.  Chapter three of Highway 10 Revisited starting... NOW. Ready? And... Break.

That’s it. Welcome home Kev.


  1. Maybe just delete some really old posts, put a few new words into them and see if people notice. Uh, just kidding! Probabaly!

    Also if none of your excuses are valid, I should probably revaluate my blogging life. Been there, done that, except your wife. I haven't done your wife. Or a wife.

    Righ, well.

    Glad you're alive!

  2. I have actually been pretty lazy myself. lol.

  3. Damn pooping (or having to) gets in the way of EVERYTHING!
    Glad you're back.

  4. I'm scheduling laziness beginning next Wednesday. Glad you're back!

  5. I'd rather watch zombie movies than blog too!

  6. You know, with the right laptop, you CAN poop and blog at the same time.

  7. With all of that zombie knowledge you gained perhaps you can share a survival guide with us. I need all of the preparation I can get. I feel as though those facts could also be used in reference to the Jersey Shore as well. That's just concise survival guide writing.

  8. I thought you got lost on Highway 11. Welcome back.
    "The sun is still up. The sun just went down." Fantastic excuse.:)

  9. You had me at "clipping toenails." Heh.

  10. Actually, I have wondered what would happen if I suddenly died (well, besides the fact I'd have a family reunion in Hell. "Penwasser? Oh, you're with the party of 98, wayyyyy in the back. Next to Hitler's dog."
    I mean, if I were to suddenly assume room temperature, all my cyber-friends (both of them) would think I just won the lotto and said Blogger, Facebook,, etc can just go scratch. They'd think I was just some stuck-up A-Hole who just up and left without so much as a "by your leave" (whatever the frick THAT means). Of course, I'd be dead and would have a whole lot more to worry about than what folks on the Information Superhighway have to say. Still, I should have something in my will (besides stiffing my relatives) instructing someone who's computer-savvy (which may be tough because there are no Koreans in my family) to let the world know I've gone to the Great Beyond-and I don't mean Canada ("Hey, Barack? Yep, Penwasser's getting his leg humped by Hitler's dog. Yeah, I know, better than Michelle.").
    To make a long story short (too late): Welcome back. We were worried. Well, not really. It's just Blogger, after all. But, welcome back anyway.

  11. Sometimes the oddest mix of characters on the keyboard gets ya jumpstarted. Welcome back.

  12. @Lor: I don't think anyone would notice. But you know what they say about cheating and how you're only cheating yourself. Good to know you have not done my or a wife.

    @Zombie: Being lazy IS really easy isn't it?

    @Katie: Usually I end up writing about. When life gives me poop, I make lemonade. But not lately, for some reason.

    @dbs: Thanks for checking up on me... kind of was a nice smack after I hit the snooze a few too many times.

    @Bi: You have NO idea how much I sometimes would rather that.

    @Beer: That used to work, but I have discovered in my new apartment that I can see the TV from the can, so I am TOTALLY distracted now.

    @Alicia: Max Brooks already wrote the definitive guide... If I tried, I would feel like a sad sad imitator. On a side note, don't tell anyone, but I am writing a novel.

    @Antares: I knew I should have taken a left at Albuquerque.

    @Riot Kitty: Considering how not often I clip them, it might be the lamest excuse on there.

    @Al: Happy Canada Day.

    @Uncool: Happy to be back. Now I just have to read about 2,000 blog posts and I will be all caught up.

  13. Welcome back Kev! The magical internets just aren't the same without you. Next time you split, I'm going to demand to see some proper documentation if you expect the absence to be excused.

  14. Thanks... there's really no excuse. I am ashamed of myself.

  15. I, too, hate most of those things. Moving and packing are assholes. Taxes suck too. And clipping toe nails annoys me - not really... more that it annoys me when Hubby DOESN'T clip his, rather picks at them over and over until they chip away. Thanks. Now I have that annoying image/noise in my head.